Couples Therapy
Intentional support for lasting connection
How did we get here if we still love each other?
You love each other, but maintaining a secure connection is hard. You may be experiencing small resentments that have built up over time or a bigger situation that caused broken trust. You may be missing each other emotionally- when one is hot, the other is cold- and you can’t seem to get on the same page.
Maybe you feel like you’re keeping score- who did more dishes, who is making more money, who is taking care of the kids more- and no matter who gets more points, no one wins.
Perhaps you’re fighting a lot lately or you’re avoiding each other - to dodge the fights or the passive-aggressive jabs.
If your parents didn’t have a healthy marriage, you worry you won’t either. If they’re divorced, you worry that might happen to you as well.
If any of this sounds familiar and you want to fix things before it’s too late, you’ve come to the right place.
Reasons people reach out for couples’ work:
You had one big fight that shook you
Loss of intimacy
“We can’t keep living like this” moments
Fear of divorce
Feeling like roommates
A sense you could be better / closer
A baby or major life change stressing your relationship
You realize they can’t fix things alone
Infidelity
These are all completely valid reasons to seek therapy or coaching, and you’re not alone! After working together, my clients report feeling closer and more connected, argue less, and are no longer on the brink of separation. Instead, they experience greater vulnerability, more fun, and increased joy in their partnership!
How I Help:
At Deeper Level Healing I help couples navigate challenges through the use of RTM. The Relationship Theory Model (RTM) is a structured, research-backed approach that helps individuals and couples build secure, lasting relationships by teaching the emotional and relational skills most people were never taught. It is designed to transform the patterns that cause relationships to fail—such as insecurity, conflict cycles, emotional shutdown, poor communication, and low self-worth—into secure functioning, emotionally safe, and long-term connection.
Rather than offering surface-level advice or quick fixes, Relationship Theory focuses on the deeper psychology attachment theory. It helps you understand what drives your relationship patterns, how your nervous system responds under stress, and how attachment wounds and self-worth shape the way you give and receive love. From there, the work becomes practical and step-by-step: learning how to communicate with clarity, regulate emotions, create deeper connection, and repair in ways that actually rebuild trust and closeness.
The goal is to create the kind of relationship that lasts, and also to strengthen your mental health, confidence, resilience, and overall life satisfaction. When relationships become secure, life becomes easier: you think more clearly, feel more grounded, and show up more powerfully in every area of your life.
At Deeper Level Healing, Relationship Theory is the foundation for helping clients create meaningful and lasting change, from the inside out.
You may want to try out RTM if…
You’re the type of couple to dive in and commit to something big
You’re ready for intense work and long lasting change
You are both ready to work through your issues
You’ve been to therapy before (either as individuals or as couples) and want to try something different
You’re ready for a 4-6 month commitment to your marriage
You’re willing to do prep work before our sessions together
A Collaborative Approach to Your Growth
This work is designed to be both supportive and collaborative. While I will guide you through your therapy journey as your primary therapist and coach, you will also have the opportunity to engage with teachings and trainings from RTM founder, Jourdan Blue, LMFT.
These resources are thoughtfully integrated to deepen your understanding of the work, reinforce what we explore in sessions, and help you continue your growth between appointments.
If you’re curious to learn more about Jourdan’s approach, you can listen to one of her podcast episodes HERE.
Frequently Asked Questions for Couples Therapy
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The Relational Theory Model incorporates principles from the Gottman Method to help couples better understand each other and build healthier communication patterns. In therapy, this means learning how to truly see your partner’s perspective, understand each other’s values, preferences, and emotional needs, and recognize the small everyday ways partners reach for connection (what the Gottman Method calls “bids”).
We also explore patterns that can damage relationships over time, including the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse,” a Gottman concept that identifies communication habits like criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling.
Using these evidence-based tools gives couples a clear, structured approach to improving communication, resolving conflict more effectively, and developing a shared growth mindset within the relationship.
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The Relational Theory Model shares many principles with Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), particularly the focus on attachment and emotional connection within relationships. Both approaches recognize that many relationship conflicts stem from deeper emotional needs and attachment patterns developed earlier in life.
In therapy, this often looks like identifying recurring relationship cycles (sometimes described as the “infinity loop” or EFT’s “tango”), where partners unintentionally trigger each other’s fears or unmet needs. By slowing down these patterns and understanding the emotions underneath them, couples can begin to respond to each other with greater empathy and security.
Both RTM and EFT also acknowledge that long-term relationships can become powerful spaces for healing, helping partners repair old wounds, build deeper intimacy, and create a more secure emotional bond.
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Attachment Theory is a foundational part of the Relational Theory Model. It helps explain how our earliest relationships and life experiences shape the way we connect, trust, and communicate with others.
Over time, experiences such as loss, trauma, or inconsistent care can influence our attachment patterns and how safe we feel in relationships. In therapy, we explore how these patterns show up in your current relationships and how they may be affecting communication, closeness, or conflict.
The good news is that attachment patterns are not fixed. While everyone is born with the capacity for secure connection, life experiences can shift that sense of safety. Through supportive relationships and intentional work in therapy, people can develop more secure ways of relating and build healthier, more connected relationships.
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This work is immersive because we are actively rewiring your brain—not just talking about patterns, but changing them. That requires repetition, stepping outside your comfort zone, and practicing new ways of thinking and responding.
We do this through intentional “reps” and what we call “mismatch moments,” where you begin to respond differently than your old patterns. This is how lasting change happens.
You’ll start with a 5-hour Rewire Workshop, then move into 90–120 minute immersive sessions. The process includes:
6 core sessions to shift foundational patterns
Followed by a second phase of 6 sessions, tailored to your specific needs
Between sessions, you’ll stay actively engaged with:
A weekly training (about 1–2 hours)
Practicing reps and reflecting in your notes
This is not passive therapy—it’s structured, focused work designed for real, lasting change.
Under ‘Steps to get started,’ just put ‘Schedule a consultation call here to see if we are a good fit to work together’.
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Schedule a consultation call to see if we are a good fit to work together
